How should the White House respond to incredibly stupid accusations at press conferences?
This Precision Guided Humor Assignment from The Alliance of Free Blogs grew out of a comment by Walter Wallis in Jerry Pournelle’s Chaos Manor in Perspective Current Mail.
I think his answer to the question above has merit (recruit Ann Coulter and John Bolton to work together answering such press conference accusations), but we need to flesh it out a bit.
Wallis also suggests green goo or slime for the worst offenders. Maybe. But I think a more general approach would be best.
Deciding which accusations merited green goo would simply be too complex and time-consuming, and surely some Mass Media Podpeople would whine, "Why didn't Helen Thomas get slimed like I did? She's always rude and idiotic! It's not fair!"
In the service of both fairness and efficiency, I say give Ann Coulter a Queen of Hearts costume and let her have at it:
The players all played at once without waiting for turns, quarrelling all the while, and fighting for the hedgehogs; and in a very short time the Queen was in a furious passion, and went stamping about, and shouting `Off with his head!' or `Off with her head!' about once in a minute.
–Lewis Caroll, Alice's Adventures in Wonderland
Let John Bolton wield the axe.
I think that a few such White House press corpses might have a salutary effect on the White House press corps.
Of course, at first, "once in a minute" wouldn’t be a high enough frequency, but, sadly, things would settle down after a while, as Mass Media Podpeople began learning their manners—most for the first time in their lives.
Next? The floor of the Senate???
:-)
Crossposted from third world county
