I read about this the other day, and am ashamed to admit that I let it slip off my radar screen. Fortunately, my dear friend, Raven, reminded me this morning, so I can offer prayers on behalf of this hero in need:
Luis Sinco, a staff reporter for the LA Times, took this picture back in November, 2004, when the Marines entered Fallujah. The "Marlboro Marine" became an icon of the dogged determination of our brave men and women to win against the terrorists in Iraq.
But now, the "Marlboro Marine, " Blake Miller, needs our prayers:
The next day, I found Miller in a back bedroom at his uncle's house. He told me that he had come close to committing suicide the night before. He had thought about driving his motorcycle off the edge of a mountain road.
He showed me the morning newspaper. His divorce was the lead story.
I felt torn. I didn't want to get involved. I desperately wanted to close the book on Iraq. But if I hadn't taken Miller's picture, this very personal drama wouldn't be front-page news. I felt responsible.
Sometimes, when things get hard to witness, I use my camera as a shield. It creates a space for me to work -- and distance to keep my eyes open and my feelings in check. But Miller had no use for a photojournalist. He needed a helping hand.
I flashed back to the chaos of combat in Fallouja. In the rattle and thunder, brick walls separated me from the world coming to an end. In the tight spaces, we were scared mindless. Everybody dragged deeply on cigarettes.
Above the din, I heard what everybody was thinking: This is the end.
I've never felt so completely alone.
I snapped back to the present, and before I knew it, the words spilled out.
"I have to ask you something, Blake," I said. "If I'd gone down in Fallouja, would you have carried me out?"
"Damn straight," he said, without hesitation.
"OK then," I said. "I think you're wounded pretty badly. I want to help you."
He looked at me for a moment. "All right," he said.
Part two of Mr. Sinco's story is here:
Miller now sees Jessica a couple of times a month. They have not completed their divorce but remain separated.
"I see him on his good days," Jessica said, "and everything is wonderful. We actually have conversations." But then weeks pass without sight of him.
"He has to get stable," she said. "If he was better, we'd be together all the time."
Miller lives in a refurbished trailer behind his father's house. Two televisions provide constant background chatter. The refrigerator is bare. A hound named Mudbone spends most days tied in the yard.Miller is estranged from his mother. He talks with his father, Jimmy Miller, 43, about everything except Iraq.
...
It took a while to get to know Miller. But I've come to appreciate his intelligence, generosity and dignity. He is a talented musician and skilled mechanic. I try to relate to him as a brother, even though I'm older than his father.
He has helped me sort through the craziness of Fallouja. I can't stop the war, but Miller has given me a chance to make a difference -- by helping him. And maybe myself.
Often, I wonder if I've done enough. Can I let go now? Can I ever let go?
The experts tell me I may be in it for the long haul.
Armstrong says Miller is "playing out his symptoms on cue."
"He's just keeping his head above water," he said. "He can't afford any downtime because it allows him to think."
Harkness holds out hope that Miller will eventually seek intensive therapy of the kind she offered.
"He won't come in for help because a part of him is very macho," she said. "He really comes across as the Marlboro Man. My fear is that at some point, it's all going to come crashing down."
The horrors of war always affect our military to a greater or lesser degree. Some handle it "better" than others, and some break under the load. Grim, over at Blackfive, wrote an incredibly moving and insightful post the other week which may give civilians an insight as to what can go on inside our veterans; I highly recommend reading it.
I, however, have no experience in combat and no direct military training, so I cannot offer this sort of practical empathy. And so, I will do what all of us can, and turn to the God who loves us, who loves Blake Miller, and ask Him to come down and lay His healing hands on this young man, this hero, who is going through so much pain:
Dear Father in Heaven, You are truly glorious and awesome in Your power and grace. There is none like You in all the universe, and nothing can prevent You from doing all Your good will. Lord, You are our Provider and our Healer, our Savior and our Friend. You are the Mighty Warrior, the Lord of Hosts, stronger than all our tiny might, and willing to offer Your power to save us and transform us.
Father - O, Father! - one of our heroes is in pain, and in danger of falling into the inescapable mire of despair and torment. The sights he has seen, the things he has had to do on behalf of freedom, have wounded his spirit and closed his eyes to the joy and healing available to him. Father, we ask You to send Your Spirit upon Blake Miller, to heal him and to convince him of Your love and care for him. We ask that You send men and women to surround Blake with tangible evidence of Your love: hands to help, arms to hold, ears to listen, mouths to encourage, feet to serve, shoulders to support, hearts to love, and spirits to pray.
This man is my brother in You, Lord, and my brother is in pain. I know he knows Your Word, and I know that Your Word will never be ineffective. On behalf of my brother, I lay claim to Your promises:
Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort those who are in any trouble, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. For as the sufferings of Christ abound in us, so our consolation also abounds through Christ. Now if we are afflicted, it is for your consolation and salvation, which is effective for enduring the same sufferings which we also suffer. Or if we are comforted, it is for your consolation and salvation. And our hope for you is steadfast, because we know that as you are partakers of the sufferings, so also you will partake of the consolation.
Father, You have promised comfort. In his afflictions, I pray that You draw Blake closer to You. I pray that he learns how faithful and loving You are to Your children. I pray that he receives strength from You, that he rests in You and renews his spirit. Father, You have promised that his suffering is not in vain: You have a plan and a purpose in it. Please help him hold Your hand as he walks this rocky trail. Give him an assurance of the light at the end of the tunnel and a confidence that
... all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose. For whom He foreknew, He also predestined to be conformed to the image of His Son, that He might be the firstborn among many brethren. Moreover whom He predestined, these He also called; whom He called, these He also justified; and whom He justified, these He also glorified.
Father, you have promised that all things will work together for good for Your children. We know that not all things are good, but we know that You can give us beauty for ashes, and that You can turn mourning into joy. We know that You love us and are the Giver of all good things, that You want us to have abundant life so that we may be imitators and disciples of Your Son.
I pray that You will give Blake Your strength to lift up his eyes and place them on You, for You are our help and our shield, our Rock and Fortress who protects us in the storm. I pray that Blake puts his trust and confidence in You to bring him through this Valley of the Shadow of Death, knowing that You are carrying him in Your loving hands. Help him, I pray, to remember that You have begun Your work in him, and that You will bring it to completion. There is no one and nothing that can wrest Blake from You, Father, and You rejoice over him with singing, because he is Yours.
Father, protect and uphold Blake's family. I ask that You bring about reconciliation where needed, that You use this pain to draw them together and knit them into a close and loving relationship. I pray that You protect Jessica, that You encourage her to have faith in You and to pray for and love her husband. I pray that You turn Blake's heart towards her, that they be reunited as husband and wife and grow stronger together. I pray that they may become true lovers and helpmeets, partners who love and trust and support each other throughout their lives.
Father, I can only end with what many consider the "Warriors' Psalm," Psalm 91, asking that You be Blake's Deliverer, his Refuge and Dwelling Place. Rise up, O Lord, and show Yourself in Your power and glory and love for my brother, Blake:
He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High
Shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty.
I will say of the LORD, “He is my refuge and my fortress;
My God, in Him I will trust.”
Surely He shall deliver you from the snare of the fowler
And from the perilous pestilence.
He shall cover you with His feathers,
And under His wings you shall take refuge;
His truth shall be your shield and buckler.
You shall not be afraid of the terror by night,
Nor of the arrow that flies by day,
Nor of the pestilence that walks in darkness,
Nor of the destruction that lays waste at noonday.
A thousand may fall at your side,
And ten thousand at your right hand;
But it shall not come near you.
Only with your eyes shall you look,
And see the reward of the wicked.
Because you have made the LORD, who is my refuge,
Even the Most High, your dwelling place,
No evil shall befall you,
Nor shall any plague come near your dwelling;
For He shall give His angels charge over you,
To keep you in all your ways.
In their hands they shall bear you up,
Lest you dash your foot against a stone.
You shall tread upon the lion and the cobra,
The young lion and the serpent you shall trample underfoot.
“Because he has set his love upon Me, therefore I will deliver him;
I will set him on high, because he has known My name.
He shall call upon Me, and I will answer him;
I will be with him in trouble;
I will deliver him and honor him.
With long life I will satisfy him,
And show him My salvation.”
Lord God Almighty, Provider, Protector, our Banner and our Shield, I ask these things in Your power and love and in the Name that is above every name, Christ Jesus our Lord and Savior.
